The drapes of wrath

Community Columnist

People steer clear of discussing some of the most important topics regarding our lives here on earth, topics that deal with our very essence, our mutual survival and the reproduction of our kind.

They steer clear, or suffer the wrath of polite company.

Maintaining our etiquette of correctness requires us to disallow the frequent and open discussions of religion, politics and sex, unless there is big money to be made.

Pretty soon, we’ll stop talking about the environment because that has become such a touchy subject as well. Maybe I should pull the drapes, but I’ve nothing to hide.

Sometimes I feel like Tom Joad, trying to get my people to the Promised Land in an old jalopy carrying too much baggage. And though the earth has been a miraculous provider all these years, it can’t go on indefinitely without proper stewardship. There’s only so many grapes to share.

Political hopefuls cling to their tenuous beliefs while invoking their version of God’s will upon others who rightfully tread through life with tragic uncertainty and an honest grasp toward hopefulness.

As president, I would make confession a federal mandate, after which you will be exonerated for all crimes. You will be required to pray daily, attend services weekly and slaughter an animal monthly. Starting in November, you’ll slaughter a turkey, in December, a caribou, and so on. Just wipe your hatchet and your conscience on the drapes.

Corporate judges of censorship and morality dole out discriminatory hatchets upon art and unsavory subject matters with proportioned ineptitude, while commercials of erectile dysfunction and devices of sexual aid invade living rooms during after school hours of homework and family quality time.

Protestantism is no longer the majority religion in America, and yet the church demands tax-free status while endorsing candidates from the pulpit. Sometimes it seems the separation of church and state is none other than a flimsy drape.

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