Dog days

Our weird weather reminds me of that classic Twilight Zone episode in which people go mad with heat fever as the sun grows ever closer to earth. Then, the main character -- a lovely blond -- wakes from the nightmare only to find that the whole world is actually freezing, as the globe orbits further and further from its source.

That's what it's getting to be like around here: six months of hail and humidity and six months of shivering winter. Even our usually balmy autumns have been defiled by cold rain and smeared by snowfalls.

The sad thing is that we could do something about global warming, which is largely caused by carbon dioxide and methane fumes rising into the atmosphere. While the rest of the world puts their heads together to solve this threat to Mother Earth, the Bush administration doggedly refuses to acknowledge that global warming exists. We're too busy fighting wars in faraway deserts.

It's plenty hot over there too!

I'm not much of an environmentalist but I'm a realist.

The summer we're suffering should be enough to convince us all about the existence of global warming. And I'm afraid these thunderstruck days and superhumid nights merely represent the tip of the iceberg (to wistfully and wishfully mix metaphors).

Although there've been a few sunny days with reasonable temperatures, most are either too hot to breathe or too wet to walk. They're either shirt-soaked sweltering or filled with booming thunder, frightening lightning, enough rain to fill catchbasins and basements and winds strong enough to knock over trees and knock out power.

Woe is me when I can't watch my Yankees on TV!

Sure, we're used to bad weather in Upstate New York but this is ridiculous.

I used to mock the concept of Seasonal Affective Disorder -- depression caused by lack of sunlight and gloomy weather -- but now I'm beginning to believe it. In fact, I'm very SAD indeed.

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